eatbees blog

A conversation I came across on another blog three weeks ago provoked the desire to respond with some thoughts of my own. Kenza mentioned in her blog Murmures that she’d come across some videos on YouTube of Islamic “religious scholars” instructing men on the correct way to beat their wives according to the Qur’an. She kept viewing one after another as if in a trance, feeling a mix of morbid fascination and seething anger, unable to pull herself away.

I watched a second one, a third, a fourth… between those who explain the rules to follow, and those who describe the types of women who only function properly when they are beaten… another who explains that a man can only live with certain women if he keeps a stick constantly on his shoulder, another who talks about a small switch and a maximum of ten blows, or the fact that one mustn’t leave a mark, or draw blood… and finally one who speaks of the Qur’anic verse advocating beating one’s wife as a sort of owner’s manual similar to the one you receive when buying a car….

I was as if hypnotized, my will was frozen, I wanted to see more… I felt a stupor of disdain, of disgust and little by little a sort of rage froze my heart… my stomach turned inside out, I wanted to spit in their face.

Two Moroccan men got involved in the comments. Both were educated, though one was a bit more enlightened than the other. Kenza got impatient with him, because she felt that he was more concerned with how such backward thinking looks in the West than with its actual effects on women. The other man was an apologist for the traditional view. Both pointed out that the Qur’an is clear. It gives men the authority to beat their wives, but only in extreme cases, and then only in moderation. One of them knew the exact verse, 4:35, Sura an-Nisa’ (Women). The following is my synthesis of several different translations of this verse.

Men are the protectors of women because Allah has given one more than the other, and because they spend out of their wealth. So good women are obedient, guarding in secret what Allah has guarded. As for those from whom you fear rebellion, admonish them, leave them alone in their beds, and beat them. Then if they obey you, do not seek a way against them. For Allah is High, Great.

I want to present the progressive face of Islam that I believe is its true face, so I will give the most progressive reading I can of this verse. It establishes a contract between men and women that goes both ways. It starts with the assumption that men are the sole breadwinners, which was the social reality at the time. Thus, men have the obligation to “spend out of their wealth” to provide for their wives. Women, in exchange, have the obligaton to remain faithful even when their men are away. Men are admonished to deal with “rebellion” diplomatically, much like going to the Security Council for sanctions before resorting to the use of force. First they should try words, then shunning, and only then physical discipline. This must have been a step forward for women, compared to what had gone before! Yet for our modern sensibility it leaves a bad taste. We rebel against the notion that under certain circumstances a man may strike his wife, and God is okay with that.

The text of the Qur’an can’t be amended, because its every word is believed to be divine speech, dictated to Mohammed from God through the angel Gabriel. Tampering with the text is beyond the authority of any human being, and since there are no more prophets after Mohammed, there isn’t even the possibility of God having second thoughts and revising the Qur’an himself.

There would seem to be only two options for Kenza, either to renounce her religion, or to accept that her husband (I don’t think she’s married) would have the authority to beat her under certain conditions. To her credit, Kenza doesn’t go to either extreme, which would be a capitulation in my opinion. Nor does she simply stick her head in the sand. Rather, she affirms the central truth of Islam, which is that it is alive and evolving. God doesn’t want blind obedience. Religion evolves as our understanding evolves. Precisely because it is valid in all times and places, Islam shows different sides of itself in different conditions.

I defend Islam by conviction, by faith and by respect… personally I don’t see any aberration in Islam… Islam came with a clear idea, which is that it is a religion that is good for all times and all places, because it is a religion that glorifies reason and stimulates the development of thought and evolution… the spirit of Islam since its beginning has been a spirit of change and of revolution in mentalities… but people thought that the revolution was only once, then we rest on our laurels… I don’t think the philosophy of Islam early on was to remain shut inside this beautiful revolution the Prophet brought….

The Prophet of Islam arrived at a time when people were burying baby girls alive because they brought bad luck, at a time when a woman was an inferior being… he pulled her out of that, gave her the right to life, to inheritance, to spend her own money, to choose her life companion, and I could go on… isn’t the sense of all that to evolve, to move ahead, not to remain shut in by what our predecessors were doing?… to reflect and act according to what is good and honorable?….

That’s what I see in my Qur’an… as far as aberration is concerned, it’s in us, in our heads that are still those of monkeys who mimic without understanding, taking baby steps out of fear of being slapped on the hand, preferring the security of letting others think for us, and saying amen it’s less risky that way….

Regarding the issue at hand, the beating of women, she called changing the text of the Qur’an “out of the question”—an absurd idea for any Muslim—but added that our interpretation must change because the context has changed. Men no longer keep their wives under some kind of tutelage. Nor are they “the protectors of women” as the verse proclaims.

Today the reality is that she is his equal, and the aftershocks of striking are not of a physical nature, but rather psychological and relational….

What’s needed is a courageous reflection on what the Muslim world is today, and on the practice of Islam and its errors… maybe the text is immutable and sacred, but the errors that flow from it are multiple and dangerous and far from being sacred… and if the role of society is to protect its members, particularly its weakest members, then society is obliged to do that and take a stand….

And that begins with women above all, who must come to realize their role in society, that this verse of the Qur’an should no longer be applied to them by men who only hold onto the part of their rights and obligations that is convenient to them and accommodates their mediocrity….

Since I began studying the Qur’an, it has occurred to me that it is really at least two different books, operating on two different levels. The books say fundamentally the same thing, but address themselves to audiences at different stages of development. Modern psychology teaches us that there are some people who only do what is right out of fear of being punished, and others who act according to an internal moral compass. The first group might steal your mobile phone if you leave it on the cafe table while no one is looking. They are the reason we have policemen. The second group will avoid stealing even if they are under no risk of being caught. However, they might disobey a law they know is unjust—for example, by helping a slave to flee. Let’s call the first group the rabble, and the second the philosophers. The genius of the Qur’an is that it offers something to both groups.

For the rabble, the Qur’an lays down clear rules, for which there is no ambiguity. Prayer is mandatory, fasting and pilgrimage are mandatory for those who are able, lying and stealing and adultery and hypocrisy are sins. In fact, anything a person hides because he is ashamed for it to be known is a sin. God sees those sins, and punishment in the afterlife will be swift and certain. Various tortures are described, from lakes of fire to drinks of boiling metal to having the skin of your face peeled off. We are supposed to have an angel on each shoulder recording our actions. Good and bad are tallied according to an intricate set of calculations. The policeman is always there, handcuffs at the ready.

The Qur’an offers a different vision to philosophers. It is not a contradictory vision, but a vision that comes closer to the truth. The Qur’an states more than once that anyone who believes in God, his prophets, and the afterlife will know Paradise. So what is the point of all those calculations? Rules are for those who need them, but those who act spontaneously, from their own understanding, have a greater faith. In Islam this is known as ihsan or the “perfection” of faith. The philosopher understands that it is more pleasing to God to do the right thing voluntarily than to do it under compulsion. That proves we “get it,” which is the whole point. The danger is that to the rabble, this may look like we are breaking the rules! But God does not turn away from those who use the intelligence that is their birthright. Indeed he strengthens them in guidance, as the Qur’an also says many times. God cherishes a free man or woman who accepts the responsbility of that freedom, more than someone who plays it safe and obeys all the rules.

I realized a couple of years ago that we must never leave religion to the fundamentalists. What I call the “details” of religion, the specific practices or beliefs that make one religion different from another, are there simply to provide structure to their respective communities. Ultimately God doesn’t care if you pray like a Muslim or Hindu or Jew, so long as you are a vehicle of the Truth. As Kenza says, religion didn’t arrive on this planet to offer us a comfortable certainty in which we could curl up and hide. God needs no prophet or book to reveal the Truth, because it is happening around us all the time. It is the universe itself, and our presence here. To think that God would have sent Islam simply to teach men to beat their wives lightly, so as not to leave a trace, is insulting to God. God sent religion to teach us to take these questions into our own hands, to struggle with them, and complete his revolution. We are part of it, we are it. It is about freedom, responsibility… and love.

No doubt there are many who know Islam better than I do. I haven’t even read the whole Qur’an, certainly not in Arabic. I’m looking forward to your comments on this piece, particularly if it will help me learn.